Maybe you're using relaxation as a crutch.
In 1970 I read Joseph Weed's Wisdom of the Mystic Masters and found a short section on astral projection which was the first time I'd ever heard of any such thing. He said you just relax more than you'd ever relaxed before, wait, and visualize the colors of the spectrum. That's all I can remember. Whatever else the book said to do, it didn't work. My dad told me I was spending too much time lying flat on my back "relaxing" so I gave it a rest until Journeys Out of the Body by Robert Monroe enthralled me and I read it several times. His methodology for "leaving the body" also didn't make sense to me at the time. But I wanted to believe... bad.
Patricia Garfield published Creative Dreaming and melted a good bit of my skepticism about OBE. I could almost imagine this thing turning real on me. Then Stephen LaBerge popped up out of the Nowhere and I finally managed to have several lucid dreams. In the meantime, due to a breathing routine I developed, I accidentally had my first OBE, so was encouraged to practice nightly and eventually had some hypnagogic sessions which impressed me at the time. I also found myself accidentally in the Vibes one night--the freight train version--so I was suitably impressed by now, and all I needed was a magic technique to make it all effortless or at least predictable. The Vibes must have scared me, because I drifted away from what always was, and always will be, my most deep-seated interest: to be able to experience anything I want whether the physical laws say it's possible or not.
Over the years I gradually built up the plan to become conscious 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, whether in or out of the body. If Robert Monroe could do it, so could I. But I had other things to do first. In the meantime I had some transcendent dreams, a few ESP experiences by surprise, saw one UFO, saw one aura, and dabbled in self-improvement just enough to keep my keepers from throwing me to the crocodiles.
It became apparent that my plan to become proficient at astral travel and lucid dreaming was going to be a retirement project, so a mere ten years after I retired--at the age of 58--I set out to record my baseline belief system, in case it should change. As soon as I finished that project, I retired from my lifelong hobby of trying to save the world with energy inventions, and began my unworlding practice in earnest in November of 2015.
My first OBE exit took place 3-1/2 months later, and by now I've had over 20 unworlding experiences. I invented the term unworlding so we wouldn't have to insert cumbersome phrases like "out of body experiences and/or lucid dreams" into otherwise-perfectly-good sentences.
While I don't claim to be a teacher of unworlding, I have been reading, thinking, and writing about the nature of reality for so long, while developing my own unified philosophy of metaphysics which I call Synfonemia, that it would be silly of me to not show my writings to other people who are interested in this sort of thing.
I can assure you that what I have to say is not going to be a rehash of what everyone else is copying from each other. In particular, by studying my own unworldings and those of others, and reading a lot of books, forums, and websites, I feel I have been able to improve on Robert Monroe's excellent description or map of the route to the Unworld, his Focus system of mental states and unworlding enterprises.
My real name is Scott Robertson in case you're interested, but I'm using the name W. H. Early on this project, just for fun. Most people these days call me Unc, Buddy, or Uncle Buddy, but if you don't like any of those names, others I've used include Luther Limberluck, Luther Rangeley, Gunther Germley, Luther Limbolust, and maybe a few I've tried to forget. I am an American living in the Philippines, and I am married. My wife knows my real name but she doesn't use it.
W. H. Early stands for "work hard early," but you can just call me Whirly. Whirly is one of the names I use for my higher self, which I prefer to call my future self since I doubt that individuals and their spare parts are arranged according to any higher-archy.
Let me remind everyone that I am a beginner, have been a beginner since 1970, and intend to remain a beginner as long as possible so that I can experience the route to the Unworld in the greatest conceivable detail. I'm trying to stay focused on what beginners need to know, with a particular emphasis on re-describing a lot of it from the point of view of a new unified framework for metaphysics. When I get the route to the Unworld nailed down, I suppose I'll want to map out the Unworld itself, but for now this site is supposed to be about the states you might go through on the way there. For now, the way there is what I'm all about.